The Hothouse

That guy I work with, Neru? I had to arrest him for assault. He punched out some bar manager. HILARIOUS. I needed a good laugh. But the best thing about it was, when I went around his house with the warrant, they were having Spag Bol for tea, which is my FAVOURITE, and they had some left over. Bloody YUM.

Anyway, Neru said he hit the guy in self-defence, but if you ask me, he just needed to vent some rage. He’s been an uptight little sphincter since he shot that guide dog. He tried to tell me ALL about it when were on the job.

How irritating. Stuck in a car with some guy who wants to ‘share’. I hate that emotional shit. It just makes me tired.

Why do we have to talk about his problems? Can’t we talk about the Hurricanes game? Or even better, NOTHING. Because getting involved in someone else’s personal crap sets a dangerous precedent. If you’re ‘there’ for them once, they’ll expect you to be ‘there’ for them again and before you know it you’re always f**king ‘there’ for them. Better to be a heartless cow from the get-go.

Anyway, I could tell Neru needed a shoulder to cry on, or worse, a hug. Oh God. Shivers went down my spine. So I bought him a pie, but more to get out of the car before he started dumping on me than to be nice. I was hoping that by the time I got back to the car, he’d just stuff the pie in his gob and shut the hell up. Because what am I supposed to say? You’ll be okay, blah blah blah blah blah. Pointless. It won’t change the fact that he mowed down a guide dog. DEAL WITH IT. The truth is, if most of us are honest about it, what we’re really thinking in situations like this is I DON’T CARE.

But the Spag Bol was bloody yum.

Megan Brown
The Brown Eye: It’s Watching You

Kath, my sister, is always going on about her weight. We went out last weekend and she’s all worried – ‘Megs, does this outfit make me look fat?’ And, because I’m sick of hearing her go on about it, I say ‘no fatter than your other outfits’. She hit me and said it’s a ‘sensitive issue’ for her (WHICH IS WHY I SAID IT), and that I should be more supportive because I’m her sister and that, of all people, I should understand because I also have to deal with ‘fattism’.

Fattism? First, I know my police pants make my arse look big, I know I eat too much shit, I know my BMI is probably veering towards ‘overweight’, but so what? I don’t want to look like Paris Hilton, some scrawny piece of old gristle. And second, listen, if you don’t like being discriminated against because you’re fat, LOSE SOME WEIGHT. Eat less, exercise more. People, it’s not rocket science.

This guy I work with, Neru, we sometimes have fish and chips when we’re on the job. And he complains that I always nick the last of the chips. He doesn’t seem to realise I’m doing him a favour – he could do with eating a few less chips. But he doesn’t even seem to try. But then, some people don’t, do they? I’ve seen some fatties use handicapped parking spaces at the supermarket, presumably because they’re closer to the door. Wouldn’t it be better to park as far away as possible from the door and WALK?

Anyway, Kath’s in a big snit with me now for being so unsympathetic. But the fact is she’s her own worst enemy. If being overweight is such an issue for her, then the greedy cow should stop scoffing a whole box of chocolate Cornettos after tea. She should try and beat her croissant addiction and stop excusing her popcorn intake by saying popcorn’s a vegetable. She’s got no self-control. She watches those weight-loss reality TV shows for tips on healthy eating, but seeing all that food just makes her hungry and the fat guts reaches for a croissant.

Megan Brown
The Brown Eye: It’s Watching You

My new blog posting: coming soon … ie tomorrow (Friday).

Oh yeah, and the next episode of The Hothouse is on tonight TV ONE at 9.30pm.

www.thehothouse.co.nz

The Hothouse
Thursday 22 March, 9.30pm

Kip Chapman is used to playing his share of bad boys. In ‘The Hothouse’ (tonight at 9.30pm on TV ONE) he plays newcomer to the flat, and resident drug dealer, Levi Wise. The character is the latest in a line of intriguing roles the actor has played.

Chapman recently charmed audiences at the Cannes Film Festival playing the sheltered son of a mother who thinks he’s Jesus reincarnated, and he’s still recognised for his time as resident pot-smoker, Eltham, on ‘Shortland Street’.
However, the role of Levi will take audiences’ perceptions of Chapman to a new level. Within minutes of arriving at the house of his old friends, Levi was getting it on with Ruth and taking merciless shots at Neru. “Levi just enjoys baiting, and he’s interested to see when Neru would snap,” he says.

Chapman enjoys playing the trouble-maker. “The beauty of being the hedonist in the cast is the preparation. Do a bit of drinking and lots of partying with mates. My job is to keep it fresh on set every single day, have a ball, pinch people below the camera, you know?”

But Chapman is very protective of his character. He says Levi is just trying to work out what he wants in life – he’s trying to figure out if he wants to be a father to the son he just discovered and if he can stay in one place.

“It’s ridiculous to say this is the bad boy. When he’s with the right person, he can be exceedingly loyal. He’s very funny, he’s got charm, he’s generous, and he can show love.

“But all those things flip round and have disastrous effects as well,” he admits.

In this episode, Isobel and Daniel plan their engagement party, while Ruth attends a wedding she’s not invited to. Daniel has an unusual proposition for the grieving Mia – but who is he really helping? Neru’s good Samaritan act backfires, and he begins to suspect that Levi’s not the ideal flatmate. And at the party, alcohol loosens tongues.

The Hothouse
Thursday 29 March, 9.25pm

Landing the role of Isobel Jones in ‘The Hothouse’ was a huge break for recent graduate of Toi Whakaari: New Zealand Drama School, Tania Nolan. With a low-budget digital feature under her belt and numerous lesser-parts, the role of ambitious lawyer Isobel was a welcome challenge.

Nolan says she loves the mix of honesty and deception at play in ‘The Hothouse’ (tonight at 9.25pm on TV ONE). While she enjoys the moral dilemmas posed, she is fascinated by the choices her defence lawyer character faces.
“Isobel does a lot of justifying to herself, especially if she’s not 100 per cent sure of something. She doesn’t want to know whether the person is innocent or guilty. She’d usually look at whether the prosecution’s case is flawed and work with that.”

The drive to win a case, no matter if her client is innocent or not, is a constant cause for friction in Isobel’s her relationship with Daniel (Ryan O’Kane).

“Isobel’s got two very important things in her life: her career, and Daniel. She’s a lawyer who likes to win. She’s very articulate when it comes to making her point at work, but when it comes to what she feels or what she’s hurt or worried about, she can’t find the words for that.”

Nolan had a number of racier scenes where little or no clothing was required, but the new-comer to the screen, who previously worked as a life art model, says she was comfortable with the experience. “The sex scenes are an important part for Isobel because physically is how Isobel communicates her feelings.”

This week on ‘The Hothouse’ Isobel revisits Daniel’s big night out and raises the stakes on her latest case, but the stress is getting too much. Neru splashes out on an image upgrade and lashes out when it doesn’t have the desired effect. Ruth gets a shock, and Levi’s relationship with Jacob is on the rocks.

Barry rang me up last night to complain about me dumping him. He said I was ‘indifferent to his needs’ and that I should try and be more ‘sensitive’. I was in the middle of watching something on TV and told him to call back during the ads. That’s when he started to cry. I thought ‘oh Jesus, here we go’.

If you ask me, men who cry over relationship break-ups are just soft-cock little Mummy’s boys. So someone doesn’t like you any more or want to be with you. Boo-hoo. GET OVER IT. In fact, if there’s one thing I can’t stand, it’s a man who bawls. I don’t believe this ‘it’s a sign of strength’ crap. No, it’s a sign that he’s too sensitive and needs to harden up.

I sometimes think Isobel must have this problem with Daniel. This clown died in a hit-and-run and he’s all like ‘he wasn’t a clown, he was a man’. Drama queen. Just like Barry. In fact, I’d say that’s the biggest reason Barry and me broke up in the first place. F**king Barry f**king cried about f**king everything. He’d come home and go on and on and on about how much his job was ‘bad for his self-esteem’ and that he got ‘no respect’ or that he was ‘sick of the bureaucracy that diluted his good ideas’.

Wazzer.

And then, like clockwork, he’d blub and want me to hold him to make him feel better. I mean, for f**k’s sake, what am I, a DOCTOR? Anyway, I’d try and be helpful and tell him that there’s support group for people who hate their jobs. It’s called EVERYBODY. They have regular meetings at the pub.

Megan Brown
The Brown Eye: It’s Watching You

Quick video recap of the last two eps of The Hothouse.

See more at www.thehothouse.co.nz

Episode 3: Flight Risk

Thursday 15th March 2007 TV ONE 9.25pm

Funeral. Coma. Birthday Party.
It’s Neru’s birthday, but he’s not in a party mood after causing a death. Isobel and Daniel also have blood on their hands. Levi meets Jacob and has a violent confrontation with his past. Ruth’s attraction to Levi grows, but how long will he stick around? Daniel connects with the clown’s widow, Mia. At the birthday party Neru’s mother has more than cake on her mind.

Last saturday was a great weekend to be an Aucklander. The sun was shining, the Blues won, the Pasifika festival was marvellous, and the fireworks display in the Domain to herald the beginning of the AK07 Festival was breath-taking. White, brown and yellow intermingling as successfully on the grass as spectacularly in the fireworks above.

I want to bring something up here- when I want by definition ‘Kiwi’ music Fat freddys drop sits comfortably beside Crowded House, Bic Runga sits with ease beside the Feelers.

-when I want good quality Kiwi film Whale rider rests alongside Fastest Indian, No.2 rests alongside In my Father’s Den…

– the same can be said for the performing and visual arts, the literary arts, etc

hmmm I see a pattern emerging-that is, the strength of multiculturalism enriching our identity and arts. So someone tell me please why the THREE local dramas funded this year all focus and appeal to only one sector of the audience-that is the White, European Middle class?

Test your morals in the “not for entertainment purposes only” morality test on The Hothouse website.

www.thehothouse.co.nz

Click on Morality Quiz. Obviously.

And why not tell us how well you did.

Episode 2 – Misconduct

(Screened Thursday 8th March 2007 TV ONE)

Ruth has trouble using the shower after having a weird vision of the day her father died when she was ten. Levi laughs at Daniel’s lame plan to tell Isobel about Kim and advises him to keep quiet. Ruth fails to convince Lily to press assault charges against Charles and decides to stop him herself. Neru warns Ruth not to take the law into her own hands. Daniel, preparing to talk to kids about the evils of drugs, admits to Levi that he couldn’t tell Isobel the truth. Ruth goads Charles and their clash turns ugly. In arresting Charles, Ruth loses control and assaults him.

Protecting Ruth, Neru reluctantly lies to Sergeant Bradshaw that Ruth didn’t use excessive force. Ruth persuades Bradshaw to keep Charles in the cells overnight while she talks to Lily, who she convinces to go to a safe house. Levi prepares to sell his imported E and seems to be avoiding a mysterious letter in his suitcase. Daniel uses his drug talk to the school kids as therapy, but it doesn’t help and finally the guilt he feels for cheating on Isobel renders him impotent. Ruth puts things right with Neru and, feeling good about her day, even considers having sex with Levi again.

Levi learns of Daniel’s ‘failure to launch’, retracts his earlier advice to say nothing and coaches Daniel in how to tell Isobel the truth. Ruth’s upbeat mood is cut short when she’s told Lily has bailed out Charles. Fearing for Lily, Ruth goes to her house to save her but Lily’s not there. She hears Charles in the shower and has another vision of her father, sitting in the shower, afraid to go to his job as a cop. He asks ten-year-old Ruth to stay home with him, but she persuades him to go to work.

Ruth informs Charles’s boss that he’s employing a wife-beater, and Daniel takes back the drugs he planted on Kim and prepares to tell Isobel the truth. Levi hooks up with an old mate, Nick and they resume ‘business’ at the expense of another drug dealer, Keith. Ruth’s meddling prompts Charles to pay her a visit and make threats. Ruth makes a last ditch effort to save Lily, but she refuses to leave Charles and headbutts Ruth.

Daniel tries to tell Isobel about Kim but he ends up asking her to marry him instead. Isobel’s reaction causes Daniel to swerve into the path of an oncoming scooter, ridden by a clown, who dies at the scene. Panicked, Isobel and Daniel don’t confess their involvement in the accident, fearing it will jeopardise their futures. The flatmates toast the announcement of Daniel and Isobel’s ‘good news’, and Levi continues to rile Neru. It’s revealed that Ruth’s father was killed at work the day she found him in the shower, and she almost tells Levi that she blames herself for his death – she couldn’t save him, like she couldn’t save Lily.

Don’t miss Episode 3 (Flight Risk): Thursday 15th March 9.25pm TV ONE