The fat old cow at TVNZ who can not cook and loves food has farted and I for one has gone off to the other stations like TV3. TV one used to be the number one station I used to watch, but now is a dead loss, Hotel Inspector has gone like all the other shows worth watching on TV one, this week I have been watching Heartbeat on DVD they dont make 18 years of Heartbeat if nobody used to watch it, but what does the fat old cow at TVNZ know all we get is cooking crap.

I’m figuring out what I am going to do.

TV1 is airing the movie length premiere “This is Not My Life”, at the same time Prime is airing “Survivors”. Then there is the usual shows I watch on C4.

Now look at Wednesday night. There is nothing on except maybe “True Blood” which I’m not really into or “Castle” which I haven’t got round to seeing yet. V: The Remake sucks, so I’m not going there.

Back to Thursdays, my only option is to tape TV1 and switch back and forth between Prime and C4.

Duncan Garner putting you off your Breakfast or does TV3 just suck at Mornings?

As the political show season continues one thing is fairly clear you weren’t waking up with Sunrise and you sure as hell aren’t brunching with ‘The Nation’. Yesterday’s 11 a.m. show received a 2.4% audience share in viewers aged 5+ (the broadest demographic followed), and probably the one taken most into account by NZ On Air as it considers its appropriations of funding for the next season. This probably offers some solace to TV3 because if they went for TV3’s own 18-49 year old demographic the show received a 1.4% share being beaten 8 times over by Mediaworks’ low-rating music network C4, and almost 18.5 times by reruns of ‘Come Dine with Me’ on TV1.

I think there are a few reasons for this. Firstly, yesterday’s dismal numbers are the worst we’ve seen so far, and were probably related to content, rather than Form. Off the bat we had mediator Stephen Parker declaring the show would be focused on Global Warming. Now no question global warming is a serious issue in need of discussion. But at this point it seems pretty clear there’s few topics less toxic to viewers (perhaps erectile disfunction, or a diabetic limb amputation, but not by much). There is of of course an exception in giving airtime to skeptics (something which Prime was notably successful in last year when it aired Martin Durkin’s “Great Global Warming Swindle”) but I digress. Contrast TV3’s global warming to TVNZ’s ‘Q+A’ which also took it on this morning, but only in the final break of the show. TV3 should learn from this, if you’re going Global Warming, you best Promo everything else in your Openers because audiences couldn’t care less.

With this in mind it’s probably best to move on to my biggest point, that TV3’s ‘Nation’ seems completely disconnected from the political discourse of the actual Nation.  For example in a week where Whanau Ora was the headline winner ‘Q+A’ went nuts on it while TV3 missed it altogether, and then in an odd sort of acknowledgment chased it up the following week. The week just gone being another example, with TVNZ shining the light on Tertiary education, and TV3 doing Global Warming and NZ Exports to China. TV3’s ‘Nation’ producers “Frontpage” really need to open a Newspaper or two throughout the week and actually craft their program on stories people care about. You could even go so far as to argue there is validity in TVNZ’s argument that political programming is best done by the Broadcaster’s news division (as they are more in touch with the political discourse of the week).

When it comes to presenting style, Paul Holmes is a veteran and arguably a national treasure so it is probably unrealistic to expect TV3’s Stephen Parker to bring along the cache of Viewers Holmes commands. But Parker is good, very good and no doubt an asset. That said, he’s not the main interviewer TV3’s Duncan Garner is, returning to the limb metaphor I would go out on one to say you’d be hard pressed to find an interviewer more adept with the sound of his own voice than Garner. Indeed often there is little for the panel to discuss post-garner interviews largely because the guest hasn’t managed to get a word in edgeways. And that is a good seg way for my next point, the inferior make-up of the Nation’s panel. A variable smorgasbord of has-been talkback hosts and NZ herald columnists so desperate at securing the takeaway sound-byte of the day they bury themselves in a skin-deep merry-go-round of irrelevant lowest common denominator discussion. Case in point TVNZ’s Q+A often ends up as a top story on 3News’ Sunday Night bulletin, with The Nation, never to be heard from again (there are of course exceptions to this, the big one being developments on the Foreshore & Seabed negotiations and what customary rights meant for Maori). Please TV3, look at pursuing more literate academic’s for your panel. If you’re discussing general Political issues Raymond Miller from Auckland University is good, or for Maori Ann Sullivan holds her own too. I say these two mostly because I have had experience with them during my time at University, but there’s of course plenty more no doubt just as good.

Finally, I’m not opposed to having prepared packages in political shows like ‘The Nation’, but they are expensive to make, and I’m not sure Frontpage has the mix quite right. There was recently a very interesting SOT on the Maori party, and religion outside church, that said there’s also been a few arty ones that feel a little like they belong on a more late night artsy typed show, particularly given “The Nation’s” commitment to mainstreaming (read: dumbing down) the pretentiousness of political debate, with its showboat interviewers, and ‘provocative’ panels. If they can reign this in perhaps, these art segments will feel more at home.

Basically (although you may not have picked it up from this rant), I think ‘The Nation’ has real potential, it has a production crew and moderator with a good track record, but I think tweaking its content, panel and interviewing style will allow it to be a lot more than it is at present, and I challenge Richard Harman and his team to try.

I just seen a preview for this. It looks like a colonial time reality tv show. That has a maori family and a pakeha family.

The funny thing is, didn’t the Jaquie Brown Diaries spoof something like this a couple of weeks ago?


There is a lack of structure on TV1 TV3 and Prime. Its would be good to know that the program you are watching will be on the following week until the current series ends. However as we are all aware, time and time again TV companies stick in old episodes to lengthen a series, the crop the length of a series and hold episodes over till the next series starts………..WHY?

Just give us what we want, a complete series of programmes at the same time each week until the series ends!


Oh and quieter adverts, less advert breaks, more quality programs,  less swearing before 9.00pm, no bad language before 7.30pm, more paul henry rawden christy and simon dallow, less mark sainsbury, and so on……

Really enjoyed this series – new episodes – on TV1 from 9-35am – 10-45am weekdays – even had some four-parters with it.

A very good show that – just sorry it’s finished now. 🙁

Who else likes it?